Into the Deep

I visited a childhood swimming spot when I was visiting the old homestead in the Alleghenies in PA this past summer. I remember going camping with cousins at the spot before I was five years old. We would eagerly run carefree down the hill from our campsites toward a very cold man-made mountain lake with our young mothers sprinting close behind carrying sand buckets, plastic shovels, towels, snacks and drinks. None of the pack of cousins knew how to swim during such young and tender ages so we had the mother-made restriction of not going in above our waists, and they were close by to make sure that rule was strictly obeyed.

At the age of six, we moved to North GA. The summers in "Dixie" were extremely hot and muggy for those from the north. Public swimming was the answer for young children, and mothers who lived in homes without air conditioning. To help put my parents minds at ease, I was soon enrolled into a two-week swimming lesson program at the local YMCA. I don't remember much about the program, but I do remember the first few days of lessons, we stayed in that shallow "not going in above our waists" water. By the end of lessons, our last day, was jumping into the deep end, which was about 10 feet deep, and swimming the breadth of the pool unaided. I still remember the fear and trepidation I felt right before I jumped. One special comfort of that moment was the other 6-7 year olds swimming next to me who also took this scary plunge for the first time that day. There was the sense of "we are all in this together." I also remember the elation and joy as I swam unaided to the other side.

It seems that most of our lives are spent splashing around in that shallow water of numerous superficial relationships. Often this is the result of a cursory and fast-paced life-style society has inclined us to lead evidenced by our excess in "doing" and absence of "being." The surplus of "doing" insulates us from launching into "the deep" soul touching that involves trust, time and vulnerability.

Last night I had the privilege of entering the deep with a few precious friends. These are the special group of friends with whom I often make that swim. One friend in particular was wrestling through the onslaught of grief having just lost a loved one to suicide. She welcomed us into the raw truth of that moment. There wasn't the outward facade of sickening religiosity that so often shows up in "Christian" circles covering up the reality of raw emotion and pain. The type of religiosity that hides the truth keeping others out (in the shallow) and the hurting one in the isolation of pretense and denial. She trusted us by allowing us to wade into the deep with her...to cry with her...to reminisce about the loved one...to laugh...to open up about family dysfunction..to cry again. This was soul touching soul time. This was the deep.

There is a special reassurance knowing there are those who also will swim out to be with me when I am in the deep. This post is for you.